Cairo: round 2

I didn't like the look of the "Virgin Merry cock" advertised in front of me, and the girls werent too keen on the prices in general so we up and left- The restaurant we were in that is.. Turns out we got taken to a place where we get charged ridiculous prices and tour guides get kickbacks from the restaurant after- maybe if we got into Egypt that day we would have fallen for the 50 pound price just for lunch. We ducked out and headed up the road looking for a feed- Me and Lyn and 3 accountants from Canada- Martine, Wendy and Isobelle. After a few bung options- closed shops, run down shops and cat food parlours, we walked past the best smell we have come across yet so dropped in. The menu was completely in Arabic, so although we could understand the prices, we had no idea if we were ordering a half a cow or a paper napkin. We somehow arsed our way through asking for two "mediums" and three "smalls" via hand gestures and awaited our surprise meals. Surprise it was- 3 different kinds of pasta, 4 different kinds of legumes in a bowl with mixers of chili sauce and tomato paste in a create-your-own style meal. It was the best feed we had in a fair while, and our first real taste of local food. When we went to leave we got the bill and paid for what we thought were Lyn and my meals- turns out we actually paid for the entire group's lunch with our 14 pound price, and we were well fed and stoked. Yep- That's a pricey $4 for 5 meals, and desert.

After getting in with the locals for lunch (the tourist district was WAY behind us) we headed deeper into the fold and trekked up some local streets, leap frogging 8-lane mini highways and weaving through local bazaars in the afternoon peak hour. Walking through the bazaars is a pretty tiring game- you need one eye on the floor to dodge the leg eating puddles with piranhas and typhoid in them, one eye on the road ahead and behind looking for scooters, trucks, bikes and people with their entire shops on their heads running through the market lanes trying to take you out, a third eye on the lookout for low obstacles- scaffold bars, hanging displays, catenary wires... Then theres the market vendors that love jumping in front of you holding a hand made Egyptian cotton shawl that you never knew you needed, but they will convince you otherwise within seconds of you responding to their "Welcome to Cairo! Where you from?" predator call. This day we had a destination in mind though, so it was a beeline from one end of the bazaar to the huge citadel silhouetted on the horizon on top of a giant sand dune overlooking this half of the 20 million strong city. We were told by Imman, the tour guide that took us to the Virgin Merry Cock vending eatery that it was a 15 minute walk. After 45 minutes of it still sitting unreachable on the horizon we realised we had another bum steer from her.

When we finally got to the front wall of the Citadel, we realised scaling the 20 odd metre retaining wall with spires and turrets wasn't going to be an easy achievement, given we left our ladders and trebuchets back in the hotel. As we skirted the walls looking for the lonely planet recommended stair case, we ran into a couple of Cairo locals that kindly let us know the citadel gates closed for the day half an hour ago, but led us through the Islamic city's oldest streets and to the oldest mosque in Cairo. After they asked for 50 pounds each for entry, we smelt a trap again, thanked them and bolted. Unfortunately for us, the previous 20 minutes of walking through 1-lane pot holed winding intersecting streets lined with Egyptians, local shops, run down squat unit blocks and a distinct lack of anything white or western had made us completely lose our way, the sun was setting and we couldn't spot a single landmark or anything remotely familiar. The maps of the area were just shaded green where we were, had no streets marked and there were no street names anyway. I couldn't help but laugh when Lyn told me the guys that led us there moved into the area recently and lost their house for a day after they moved in! It was going on sunset, and we felt the familiar feeling of being lost lambs in a wolves lair. As cute as it started, every single person yelling "Welcome to Cairo! Where you from?" as we neared them became almost a haunting cat-call after a while and our hopes of finding something that could be considered a road were dwindling. The Canadian chicks that were with us had never been down parts of town like this before and they weren't feeling too comfortable, and no ones maps, books or magazines seemed to have the labyrinth of paths we had taken to get to where we were. Enter the saving grace: Cairo's endless array of green-lit mosque spires. We headed into the biggest one we could find, and for the princely sum of $3 each, climbed to see over the canopy of run down unit blocks and get a birds eye view of the town and find a path out. From the top it was pretty amazing- seeing farms, soccer fields, laundries, garbage tips and gardens on rooves, the skyline silhouette covered in satellite TV dishes, and green fluoro mosque towers lighting as the sun sank. In the end, the afternoon couldn't have worked out better- great company, good food, incredible sights of a different side of town to anything we expected and all for less than $10.

I am still amazed at the differences in traditions between here and home. Take for example, the $20 lada car that had its entire damaged passenger's side replaced, bogged up and was being resprayed in the panel beaters alley we were walking down. Just the bog to fix this thing would have been worth more than the car itself, but peoples labour is dirt cheap so there is a totally different take on what is worthwhile and the value of an asset. The kids build cubby houses in trash piles, people use their own rooves as rubbish dumps to insulate from the summer heat, keep their goats with their chickens and ducks on their unit rooves and feed them the weeds that grow in building rubble...

On first glance the place is a slum, but its actually well organised with unwritten laws and understandings that I'm only just beginning to get the hang of. Like the law of passing in a bazaar. People riding a bike with 7000 bread rolls balanced on their head have right of way over a bloke with a sack the size of a car on his head, who wins over kids carrying a sulo-bin sized twined together stack of shoe boxes... But then there is the overall dominatrix: the 80 year old lady. She can turn you to stone with a look, and if you make her drop any of her entire months worth of shopping she has balanced on her head and back while she navigates the bazaar bent double and only able to stare at the bitumen, your life wont be worth living. Not even the scooters trying to run down people that don't leap out of their way mess with these witches.

Earlier in the day me and Lyn had the privilege/painful experience of visiting the Hilton. After we arsed up the dates for our flight out of Cairo to Athena, we had to call Aegean Air to change, and of course we left it to the last minute. In the Hilton, I managed to convince them we had just checked out and they let us use their international phone in exchange for my first born son. 60 pounds and one damn quick phone call later we had our flights re booked and were sorted. Lyn tried to get a water while I sorted the flights, and had a good laugh all the way back out of the shop when told how much it was. I think we dropped the price of real estate in the area as soon as we walked into that place, and they probably locked the doors behind us after we left.

That night we had the final dinner for our tour group and headed to Deals restaurant for a feed with some finale drinks. There was a bit of a speech done for Waleed then we retired back to the hotel for some after drinks on the roof. The dinner was pretty good- Good priced drinks and food, and good company. One of the ladies in the group put on a speech for Waleed as we said our thanks and it was all pretty cool. One thing I'm still not really used to: Tipping. We tipped for meals, drinks, and the tour guide as well. Pretty much the only places you don't tip are the dirt cheap local hangouts where Id be happy to tip anyway because its so much better value and a new experience. A few days ago Waleed too me for a cruise in his car through Cairo from about midnight to 3am and we hit a his local hangout with his brother and a mate of theirs. They both thought I was Egyptian and started talking to me in Arabic when I jumped in the car and waleed pissed himself laughing. After the nightmare bus ride from Sinai we were pretty hungry so got stuck into an Egyptian kebab, washed down with my favourite Egyptian bevvy- the non-alcoholic beer. After showing me the sights and giving us a show of the demo-derby driving style you need to get through your local streets we headed back to the hotel for a couple hours sleep. I dont know how well Waleed slept- He said every time he goes on a tour he leaves his car to his brother and when he gets back theres some new colours of paint on the car from kissing other cars. This time there was white on the Drivers side quarter panel, Red on the RHS Guard, and black on the rear bar. I recommended the old toothpaste trick on the deeper scrapes and he laughed thinking he was the only one that knew about that.

The day after the going away dinner we bummed around the hotel for a bit and made friends with some of the younger staff in the place. Wendy showed us how to make paper origami frogs and we were entertained for a good hour. Its funny how when in holiday mode you can zone out and be content doing SFA- No chance of it happening usually. We traded Lyns Moroccan-Arabic CD of "dance music" (aka: 80 minutes of mobile phone ring tone with a mind numbing synth drum beat to it) for a bunch of English movies and Egyptian-Arabic songs on computer. In the taxi on the way to the airport we learned some more Arabic from the driver, which was "Mashi" and after almost being run off the road by a few trucks got into the airport in time for our 7 bloody hour sit around after our plane broke and a new one needed to be flown in. During this time though we managed to scam free food, free drinks and somehow they didn't boot us out of the Egypt air first class lounge when we slipped past the security guard when he went to the toilet. The Sheiks around us in their pristine white Jalabas and head scarves with matching Gucci leather sandals and briefcases were not impressed.